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translated by Afrodite

ILTALEHTI 2.11.2008

"I was with mother on her last moments"

When Tarja Turunen's mother told she had a serious cancer Tarja felt like the bottom of her life had gone. Mother's positive attitude taught a lot though.

- I feel relieved and peaceful, Tarja Turunen, 30, smiles.
The reason for Tarja's good feeling is My Winter Storm solo album that will be released in mid October. Even though the singer has spent busy hotel life marketing the album talking about it is a pleasent job. An own album has been a new kind of exploration for Tarja not only to making music but to herself as well.
- The album tells about my struggle for my dreams. I've wondered what makes me happy and I realized how important it is that I can do this job and I have close friends and a loving family.
In the past Tarja has experienced loss: death of her dear mother and a dramatic sacking from Nightwish have changed the diraction of life for moment.
Things have however settled on their path due to her outlook on life.
- I try to listen to myself and live daily feeling strongly that I'm happy.

Voice was found on singing lessons

The early 1980s in Kitee's Puhos. The five-year-old Tarja is cross because daycare's nanny has just told that the solo song in a music play will be sung by someone else than Tarja.
- I was so irritated! I loved to perform, Tarja now recalls.
Even though she missed the solo role Tarja has turned into a world famous singer. And it probably wasn't a coincidence that she ended up being the only female member in a heavymetal band; Tarja got used to group of guys growing up with a big and small brother and as the only girl in primary school.
Music was a part of the family's life. Her parents took her to piano lessons at the age of six. Tarja herself noticed her gift for singing in junior high school.
- I decided at that point that I wanted to make a profession out of music.
A few years of dating with her first boyfriend ended when Tarja moved away to Savonlinna Senior Secondary School of Art and Music at the age of 15.
- It was a great time for growth. I was interested in religion and I saw a lot of young people in school who were deeply religious. It was liberating since I didn't have to hold things back.
The enthusiasm for classical singing was born at that time.
- I performed a lot then but my voice couldn't take it. I paniced! I wanted to learn to sing correctly.
In classical singing class Tarja's voice changed dramatically.
- For me it was a jump to the unknown. I observed my voice constantly. The symbiosis between music and my voice instrument gave me awesome feelings.

Nightwish gave a lot

Tarja knew she wanted to be a singer but she didn't know what kind of work she would do as a singer. She was in the beginning of her studies on the church music line in the Sibelius Academy when the answer literally came to her door.
Tarja was at home in Kitee on holiday when Tuomas Holopainen who she knew from school rang the door bell.
- He was standing at the door and said that he had this demo if I was intrested. He thought I still had the delicate voice I had before and was suprised that it had changed.
When Nightwish first gathered in the winter of 1996 it sounded quite different than the heavy Nightwish.
- The demo was acoustic music. Then Tuomas had a great idea of combining heavier music with a voice like this.
The band's direction was up ever since.
- We immediately got a three year record deal. I remember shopping with mum for my first pair of leather pants! I was damn nervous about the first gigs.
Music studies needed to be left aside for Nightwish. The band become a fulltime job.
- First we laughed that we won't do any gigs but then I saw myself stepping onto bigger and bigger stages.
Soon Nightwish conquered the charts and stages of Europe, Asia and America. The story is familiar - as is its ending. The first signs that band life wouldn't last forever floated in the air on long tours.
- My voice couldn't rest since I needed to spend time in smoky and draughty backrooms. I carry my instrument always with me. It's a different thing to play the guitar because you can put it away when the gig is over, Tarja says.
Tarja wanted to take better care of her voice and begun classical singing studies in Germany on 2002. The last years with Nightwish were the finest according to Tarja and filled with great moments.
- One of the best was the gig in Hartwall Arena. I couldn't understand that I'd be singing there for a sold-out hall, Tarja recalls her last Nightwish gig.
- The music in Nigtwish always worked, she adds, emphasising the word music.
That same night, on 2005, after an unforgettable concert Tarja got a letter where the other members of Nightwish told they were firing their vocalist.
Tarja doesn't want to repeat that moment. She'd rather talk about the good things the band career brought.
- Nightwish was an important factor in my growth in music. I got great experinces through it. Thanks to the band I have these datums to do my own thing.

Marcelo became her soul mate

When she was younger Tarja always thought she'd marry a Finnish man until on tour she came across an Argentinian that changed her mind.
- We had arrived to the country and a barbecue party was held. He was quiet but I was probably even more quiet, Tarja laughs about her and Marcelo Cabuli's first meeting.
Marcelo travelled along on tour, took care of the bands business and impressed Tarja with his earnestness.
- He always had time for me. He listened and was there.
Love grew slowly.
- I wondered what was happening when I thought about him when going to sleep. I thought was I completely nuts, when I had feelings for a man across the planet.
- When Tarja and the band travelled to Finland after a week the feeling was "terrible" according to Tarja, from longing.
- Then Marcelo suprised me and came to Finland. I didn't make it easy for him, I told him not to come like a hundred times.
Marcelo's trip to Finland sealed the relationship.
- I felt a soul mate in him. It was immediately deeper than ever before.
The missing begun and travellig back and forth. Before their wedding on the summer of 2003 Tarja and Marcelo spent months apart.
- The long distant relationship lasted for almost three years before I said that travelling alone has to stop. Since we had been given an opportunity to be together we had to rethink our lives.
The first home together was set up in Karlsruhe Germany and Marcelo became Tarja's manager.
- The relationship is irrationally huge source of strength. It's wild that he is from a totally different basis and culture but never have we had a cultural collision. He's not only a husband but he's also a friend. Tarja is grateful also because Marcelo had the time to get to know her mother.
- They had a really deep connection. He has said that he got another mother from my mother. It's a great feeling when your own husband says it aloud.

Mother never gave up

Mother comes up in Tarja's speak constantly. Mother is still present in the singer's life even though she passed away a few years ago.
Tarja was always a mum's girl but in early adulthood the mother and daughter became really close. When mum told Tarja she had cancer it was shock for her.
- I felt like everything was coming down on me. I was hard to get a hold of any good things in life.
- Mother herself was extremely positive till the end, very strong. I have a lot to learn from her. She fought with both hands against the fists and never gave up.
Tarja's mother was ill for years before she faded away. The last years were according to Tarja good times, time for family.
- The cohesiveness grew. We felt like we'd stand together no matter what.
The last moments Tarja spent tightly with her mother.
- I was home with her for the last months. I put aside the studies in Germany and was with her. If I hadn't been able to be there I'd regret so much.
- She was utterly important for me.
Mother supported Tarja in everything and trusted her daughter in everyting she did. That has affected also Tarja's life most recent turn, her solo career.

"I was finally encouraged to make music"

Tarja is more than safisfied with her My Winter Storm album.
- The product of years of thought labor is ready. When we begun to work on the album I knew what kind of music I wanted to do but the vision was hard to turn to words. Luckily I stood up for myself : the album looks like me.
The album has metal with heavy guitars, orchestral backgrounds and a touch of film music. Tarja's classical voice holds the elements together.
The album was recorded all over the world and had hard-core music people working on it, who have worked with Madonna, Faith No More and Rolling Stone among others. With the professionals Tarja found a new passion to make music; she was encouraged to write music and lyrics and the result was Tarja co-writing eight songs and writing one song all on her own.
- For the first time I was surrounded by people actually encouraging me and gave me the opportunity to do this. I didn't have the space before.
Though Tarja clearly refers to her Nightwish times she refuses to place blame.
- I'm thankful for how much the band gave. I've brought something from there to my solo career.
She hasn't met Tuomas after the sacking.
- I believe we'll see eachother again. Finland is a small country after all
.